What Are You Really Afraid Of?

There’s a question most people don’t ask themselves honestly…

Why is it so hard to wait?

We say it’s love.
We say it’s connection.
We say it’s “just what people do.”

But if we slow down long enough to tell the truth…

Deep down, the reluctance to give up sex isn’t always about desire.

It’s about fear.

Fear that if we don’t give it up…
we’ll be left.

Fear that if we don’t hold on physically…
we’ll lose them emotionally.

Fear that if we say no…
we’ll end up alone.

And beneath all of that…
is a deeper fear:

“What if nothing ever fills this void?”

Fear will always push you to settle.

Fear doesn’t lead—it pressures.

It whispers lies like:

• “This is the only way to keep them.”

• “You won’t find anyone else.”

• “Something is better than nothing.”

So instead of waiting with confidence…
we settle out of anxiety.

Instead of trusting God…
we try to secure something ourselves.

But anything built on fear will always require you to compromise to keep it.

And that’s a heavy price to pay.

The void is real… but so is the truth.

Let’s not pretend the void isn’t there.

The desire to be loved…
to be seen…
to feel close to someone…

That’s real.

God created that.

But what fear does is convince you to fill a God-sized space with a temporary substitute.

And it never works.

Because what feels like connection in the moment…
often leaves you emptier afterward.

Why?

Because physical intimacy was never meant to carry the weight of emotional healing or spiritual fulfillment.

Jesus fills what people never could.

The truth is simple… but not always easy to accept:

No person can fill what only Jesus was designed to fill.

Not attention.
Not affection.
Not sex.
Not a relationship.

Only Him.

When you allow Him into those empty places—
the ones you’ve been trying to cover, rush, or ignore—

He doesn’t just “help”…
He restores.

He brings peace where there was pressure.
Security where there was fear.
Wholeness where there was lack.

And suddenly…

You’re no longer choosing to WAIT out of restriction—
you’re choosing to WAIT from a place of fullness.

Jesus said it plainly:

“Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need.”— Matthew 6:33

Everything you need.

Not everything you fear losing.
Not everything you’re trying to force.

Everything you actually need.

Including love.
Including companionship.
Including purpose.

But it comes in His timing…
and His way.

And what God gives…
you won’t have to compromise to keep.

WAIT isn’t about punishment.

It’s about protection.
It’s about alignment.
It’s about trusting that God knows what He’s doing with your life.

You are not going to miss out by doing things God’s way.

You’re going to be preserved by it.

So the real question isn’t just:

“Can you WAIT?”

It’s:

“What are you believing that makes you feel like you can’t?”

Because once fear is replaced with truth…

WAIT stops feeling like loss—
and starts looking like wisdom.
You don’t have to fill the void—Jesus already can.

Share this with someone who’s been struggling to WAIT—not because they don’t love God, but because they’re afraid to be alone.

Single Silvers, Same Standard

There’s a quiet narrative that often goes unchallenged…

That purity, boundaries, and waiting are conversations for the young.

But the truth is—God’s standard doesn’t age out.

According to the CDC, rates of some of the most serious STDs—chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis—have risen among older adults in recent years. That alone should cause us to pause.

Not in fear… but in awareness.

We’re living in a time where:

• People are living longer

• Medications have extended sexual activity into later years

• Divorce rates in mid-life have increased

• Online dating has made new connections easier—but not always safer

And many entering this stage of life were never taught about sexual health the way later generations were.

But here’s what hasn’t changed:

God’s design.

Hebrews 13:4 reminds us:

“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure…”

By all.
Not just the young. Not just newlyweds. Not just those figuring life out.

All.

There’s a misconception that once you’ve lived a little, experienced a lot, or even been married before… the standards somehow loosen.

They don’t.

Because purity was never about age—it’s about alignment.

And let’s be honest…

There is no age limit on:

• Heartbreak

• Emotional attachment

• Regret

• Or consequences

But there is also no age limit on:

• Obedience

• Self-control

• Wisdom

• And starting again

Whether you’re 25 or 65…

The WAIT still matters.

Not because God is trying to restrict you…

But because He is protecting you.

1 Thessalonians 4:3-4 says:

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain… that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor.”

Holiness doesn’t retire.

Honor doesn’t expire.

And wisdom doesn’t go out of style.

If you’re in a season of dating again… navigating relationships after divorce… or simply desiring companionship…

Let this be your anchor:

You don’t have to follow culture to find connection.

You don’t have to compromise to feel wanted.

And you don’t have to rush what God has already ordered.

There is no age limit on choosing God’s way.

And there is no regret in doing it His way.

WAIT.

Not out of fear…
But out of faith.

You’ve lived enough life to know this:
Peace is always worth more than a moment. Choose wisely.

Share this with someone who thinks it’s “too late” to do things God’s way.

Don’t Get Tired of Doing Good

There’s a quiet temptation that shows up when you’ve been doing the right thing for a long time…

…and nothing seems to be changing.

You’ve been praying.
You’ve been waiting.
You’ve been choosing right over easy.
You’ve been honoring God behind the scenes.

And if you’re honest… you’re tired.

Not tired of God.
Just tired of waiting.

But this is where many people miss it.

They don’t fall off because they don’t know what’s right…
They fall off because they get tired of doing it.

Don’t let weariness make you walk away from what obedience started.

The WAIT Isn’t Wasted

Waiting can feel like nothing is happening.

But heaven doesn’t operate on what you see.

While you’re waiting…
God is working.

Working on you.
Working on them.
Working on things you don’t even know need to be worked on yet.

What feels like a delay is often divine preparation.

Instead of letting frustration take over…
let worship take its place.

Worship shifts your focus from:
“What’s not happening” → to → “Who is in control.”

When you worship, you’re saying:
God, I trust You… even here.
Even now.
Even when I don’t see it.

And that kind of faith?
It moves the heart of God.

Scripture gives us both a promise and a condition:

“Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” — Galatians 6:9

The harvest is coming.

But it’s attached to your consistency.

Not your perfection.
Not your feelings.
Your consistency.

The enemy doesn’t need you to become evil…
he just needs you to become exhausted.

Because exhaustion whispers,
“It’s not worth it.”

But God says,
“It will be.”

Keep Showing Up

Keep praying.
Keep choosing right.
Keep honoring God.
Keep waiting well.

Because your “due season” is not a maybe…
it’s a promise.

And when it comes, you won’t regret a single moment you stayed faithful.
Don’t let temporary weariness make you forfeit an eternal harvest.

Share this with someone who’s tired of doing right and needs a reminder not to quit.

Fight For Your Future

What you do today doesn’t stay in today.

It follows you.

It shows up later… in places you never intended it to go.

When it comes to sex, culture says “it’s just physical.”
But God says it’s spiritual.

Scripture teaches that sex creates a bond—one that goes deeper than the body.

“Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, ‘The two will become one flesh.’” — 1 Corinthians 6:16

That “one flesh” connection doesn’t just disappear because the relationship ends.

So when we step outside of God’s design, we don’t just walk away—we carry pieces of that connection with us.

And if we’re not careful, we bring that baggage straight into our future marriage.

Emotionally.
Mentally.
Spiritually.

But here’s the truth that changes everything:

You get to decide what you bring into your marriage.

You can bring peace…
or comparison.

Purity…
or regret.

Freedom…
or memories that compete with what God is trying to build.

Today’s decisions are tomorrow’s results.

So fight for your future marriage now.

Not when you meet “the one.”
Not when you get engaged.

Now.

Because the standard you set today will either protect your future… or complicate it.

And let’s be clear—God is not trying to take something from you.

He created sex.
He designed it for pleasure, connection, and unity.

But He also designed boundaries—not to restrict you, but to protect you.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” — John 10:10

God’s way leads to life.
The enemy’s way always leads to loss.

So if you haven’t had sex yet—keep waiting.
Not because you’re missing out… but because you’re protecting something sacred.

And if you already have?

There is no shame here.

There is grace.

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us… and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” — 1 John 1:9

God isn’t holding your past over your head.
He’s offering you a fresh start.

A clean slate.
A new direction.

Because He loves you too much to leave you where you were.

So starting today…

WAIT.

Not out of fear.
Not out of pressure.

But out of purpose.

Because one day, when you’re standing in your marriage, you’ll realize—

You didn’t just wait…
you fought for something worth keeping.

Share this with someone who needs a reminder: what you do today will show up in your tomorrow.

Fight The Feelings

Following your feelings can be dangerous.

Think about it…
How often do your feelings change about the same situation?
One moment you’re sure. The next, you’re unsure.
One day you’re committed. The next, you’re questioning everything.

Feelings are unstable.
They shift with circumstances, moods, and moments.

And if we’re honest…
How many emotional decisions have led to regret?

That’s the problem with letting feelings lead.
They were never designed to be your compass.

Jeremiah 17:9 reminds us:
“The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”

Your feelings aren’t irrelevant…
but they are unreliable leaders.

God didn’t leave us to figure life out based on emotions.

He gave us His Word.

His Word brings clarity where feelings bring confusion.
His truth brings stability where emotions bring chaos.

“For God is not a God of confusion but of peace…” — 1 Corinthians 14:33

Let’s talk about one area where feelings often take over—sexual desire.

God is not trying to ruin your life or take away your fun.

He’s protecting you.

Sex is powerful.
It was created with purpose, not just pleasure.

When it’s taken outside of God’s design, it doesn’t just stay physical…
it becomes emotional, spiritual, and sometimes even destructive.

What starts as a feeling can turn into a stronghold.

That’s why God gives boundaries—not to restrict you,
but to protect you from unnecessary pain, attachment, and confusion.

So the real question is…

What are your feelings leading you into right now?

Because whatever you allow into your soul
has the power to shape your future.

Not everything that feels good is good for you.

Galatians 5:16 says:
“Walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.”

You have a choice:

Be ruled by your feelings…
or be led by Christ.

One leads to regret.
The other leads to life.

Romans 6:23 reminds us:
“For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Sin will always promise something it can’t sustain.
God always delivers what He promises.

Don’t let a temporary feeling cost you a permanent consequence.

Make the hard decision now
so you don’t have to deal with harder consequences later.

Because if you don’t take control of your feelings,
your feelings will take control of you.

Share this with someone who needs to stop letting feelings lead.

Not Anti-Sex…Just Pro-tection

God isn’t withholding pleasure—He’s protecting purpose.

Let’s clear something up.

God isn’t anti-sex.

In fact, the proof is simple—He created it.

Sex wasn’t the world’s idea… it was God’s design. And not only did He create it, He created it to be good. To be enjoyed. To be meaningful. To be powerful.

So no, God isn’t trying to withhold something from you.

He’s protecting something for you.

God wants you to experience amazing sex—but in the right context.

And that context is marriage.

Because outside of marriage, it’s not just about pleasure… it’s about timing.

And if you’re not married, it’s just not time yet.

Now let’s talk real.

Maybe you’ve already crossed that line.

Maybe you’ve participated in premarital sex.

Maybe more than once.

And here’s the truth:

You can’t change what’s already been done.

But you can decide what happens next.

I’m not here to shame you.

I’m not here to make you feel guilty about your past.

I’m here to remind you that your past does not have permission to control your future.

You can still choose purity.

You can still choose obedience.

You can still honor God with your body starting today.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 reminds us:

“Flee from sexual immorality… you are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.”

This isn’t about restriction.

It’s about alignment.

And if you’re thinking…

“But I’ve already messed up.”

Let me encourage you:

God is not standing over you disappointed.

He’s extending grace and saying, “Let’s start again.”

2 Corinthians 5:17

“If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new is here!”

That means you don’t have to carry yesterday into tomorrow.

So no—God isn’t anti-sex.

He’s pro-purpose.

Pro-timing.

Pro-covenant.

Pro-you.

And today, you have a choice:

Will you keep repeating cycles…

or will you fight for your future?

What would it look like for you to honor God in this area—starting today?

He’s a Hater

Let’s be real—
Satan is the biggest hater, period.

And one of the main areas he attacks?
Your purity.

He is constantly planting negative thoughts in our minds, hoping we’ll accept them as truth.

Thoughts like:
“I can’t wait.”
“It’s too hard to stay pure.”
“Everybody’s doing it.”
“God understands… it’s not that serious.”
“I’ve already messed up, so what’s the point?”

Sound familiar?

Those aren’t your thoughts.
Those are lies.

The enemy’s goal is to keep you bound in cycles of compromise—especially when it comes to sex—so you never fully walk in the freedom God has for you.

But the old you?
The one who gave in…
The one who struggled…
The one who believed those lies—

That version of you died on the cross with Christ.

You are not who you used to be.

The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:17 that if anyone is in Christ, they are a new creation. The old has gone. The new is here.

Romans 6:6 reminds us that our old self was crucified with Him so that we would no longer be slaves to sin.

That means you are not a slave to your desires.
You are not controlled by your urges.
You are not powerless.

And John 8:36 says,
“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.”

Free from what?
Free from sin.
Free from bondage.
Free from the lie that you have to give in.

So why are we still agreeing with thoughts that go against what God already said about us?

You don’t have to keep compromising.
You don’t have to keep falling.
You don’t have to keep telling yourself you can’t wait.

Because through Christ—
you can.

Your body is not meant for temporary pleasure.
It was created to honor God.

And choosing purity?
That’s not missing out.

That’s walking in power.

No Expiration Date on the Word of God

“Forever, O Lord, your word is firmly fixed in the heavens.”
— Psalm 119:89

Someone once asked me why I promote abstaining from sex until marriage. Their argument was that the scriptures about sexual purity are outdated.

They said that when those passages were written, people often married in their teenage years. Because of that, they believe people in biblical times didn’t have to struggle with sexual temptation the way we do today.

But that reasoning raises a serious question.

If certain parts of the Bible are outdated, what should we do with them?

Do you have a pair of scissors? Because if you do, maybe we should just start cutting those verses out.

We could remove the passages about sexual purity. Then maybe the ones about forgiveness. While we’re at it, we could take out the verses about loving our enemies, humility, generosity, and self-control.

Of course that sounds ridiculous.

We cannot pick and choose which parts of Scripture apply to us and which ones do not. Once we start doing that, we are no longer following God’s Word—we are creating our own version of it.

There can’t be holes in your theology, and there certainly can’t be holes in your Bible.

God’s Word does not change simply because culture changes. What God called sin thousands of years ago is still sin today. What He called holy then is still holy now.

The truth is, people in biblical times faced temptation just like we do. Human nature has not changed. That is exactly why God gave us clear instruction about how to live.

Sexual purity was never about convenience or cultural norms. It has always been about obedience and honoring God.

God’s Word stands just as strong today as it did when it was written.

So instead of making excuses for why we shouldn’t follow it, we should choose to believe it—and obey it.

Your Body is Sacred

Sexual sin is different from other sins because it violates the sacredness of our bodies.

Say it with me:

My body is sacred.

Because it is sacred, we cannot do whatever we please with what God paid such a high price for. Our bodies are not simply our own to use however we choose.

Your body belongs to God.

He created it, and through Jesus Christ He redeemed it. That means our bodies are not ordinary—they are set apart for His purposes.

When we remember that truth, it changes how we think about purity, temptation, and obedience.

If you find yourself struggling with behaviors that do not honor God, do not lose hope. Take it to the Lord in prayer. Ask the Savior to help you turn away from anything that does not please Him—in thought or in action.

God never leaves us without help. His Word reminds us that He always provides a way of escape when we are tempted.

“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
— 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Your body is sacred.

Honor it.
Protect it.
Use it to glorify God.

It’s Never to Late to WAIT

Today is my birthday.

A few months before my thirtieth birthday, I made the decision to recommit my body to Christ. I had lived differently before, but I knew God was calling me to something better.

Even after making that commitment, the struggle didn’t magically disappear. The flesh is real, and those desires can be strong. Talking about refraining from sex and actually refraining from sex are two very different things.

Choosing purity takes strength.

It will not happen by accident. You have to make a decision and fight for it.

And the truth is, on your own you don’t have the strength you need for that fight. That strength comes from Jesus. When we draw near to Him, He gives us the grace and power we need to overcome temptation.

Scripture reminds us:

“Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.”
— James 4:8

During that season, I had to remind myself of something important: it was never too late to stop having premarital sex.

It’s never too late to WAIT.

Just because you cannot undo what you have already sown does not mean you cannot start sowing something new.

God’s grace allows us to make a new decision today, regardless of what yesterday looked like.

Premarital sex is a sin. God can forgive that sin—but even more than that, He desires to use your life for His glory.

And sometimes the most powerful testimony is someone who decides to stop, turn around, and honor God from this moment forward.

Because it is never too late to WAIT.

Worship While You WAIT

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”
— Proverbs 3:5-6

When faced with decisions, some of us rely on our own advice, while others seek the opinions of friends and family. While those voices can sometimes be helpful, they should never be the primary place we look for direction.

If we are truly trying to do the will of our Father, we must learn to go to Him first.

God desires to guide us. He wants to be the One we turn to for wisdom, clarity, and direction. When we invite Him into our decisions and sincerely seek His will, we can trust that He will lead us in the right direction.

God never leads His children astray.

The waiting season can sometimes feel uncertain, especially when we are trusting God with something as personal as relationships. But waiting does not mean doing nothing.

Use the waiting season to draw closer to Him.

Worship while you WAIT.

Spend time in His Word. Spend time in prayer. Spend time seeking His heart. As you do, you will begin to recognize His voice and trust His guidance more clearly.

And in His perfect timing, God will make His will for your life known.

Protection, Not Restriction

“I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.”
— Psalm 119:11

God doesn’t give us His commands to restrict us. He gives them to protect us.

If we’re honest, many times we need protection from ourselves. Our desires can easily lead us into decisions that feel good in the moment, but come with consequences we never intended to face.

Lust has a way of hiding its price tag. It promises temporary pleasure without revealing the real cost that often comes later.

That’s why we need constant reminders to guard our hearts and our minds.

Thankfully, God didn’t leave us without guidance. Those reminders are found in His Word.

When we fill our hearts and minds with Scripture, it strengthens our ability to recognize temptation and choose obedience instead.

When I was a child in Vacation Bible School, we used to sing a song that still applies today:

The B-I-B-L-E, yes that’s the book for me…

And it still is.

The Bible is not just a book of rules. It is a guide filled with wisdom, truth, and protection for those who choose to follow it.

So read it.

Study it.

Hide it in your heart.

When you do, you’ll begin to see for yourself how God’s divine protection works in your life.

Protect the Bond

We were created to bond — to become one unit, joined together for life. God designed us with hormones that cause us to attach deeply to our mate. This bonding goes far beyond skin-to-skin contact. It reaches into our minds, our emotions, and even our souls.

Have you ever tried to reuse a piece of tape or another adhesive? It may stick for a moment, but it never connects quite like it did the first time. Sex outside of marriage can work in a similar way. When we repeatedly bond and then break those bonds, our ability to attach deeply can begin to weaken.

Sex engages us hormonally, neurologically, and psychologically. It forms intense bonds mentally, emotionally, and physically — especially when it happens frequently.

During sex, the brain releases powerful chemicals. For women, the primary hormone released is oxytocin, often called the “bonding hormone.” For men, a key hormone involved in bonding is vasopressin. Both men and women also release endorphins, which create feelings of pleasure and happiness.

These chemicals are powerful. They make the experience feel deeply rewarding and encourage us to seek that connection again and again.

So what happens when we repeatedly form these bonds with different partners?

Scientifically, we know that repeated cycles of bonding and breaking can make it harder to form deep attachments over time. Each broken bond can leave behind emotional and neurological patterns that affect future relationships.

Yes, sex before marriage can lead to unplanned pregnancy. Yes, it can lead to sexually transmitted infections. But there is so much more happening beneath the surface.

The Hebrew word “dod” is often used to describe intimate love. It reflects the mingling of souls — bringing the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual together. Sex was designed to unite two people deeply and completely.

Whether it’s a one-night encounter or a lifelong commitment, sex bonds you to another person.

That is why protecting that bond matters.

The goal is not simply avoiding consequences. The goal is preserving the ability to connect fully with the person God designed for you.

So keep your bond intact.

WAIT for the one God ordained for you to join with for life.

Stay Committed to Your Commitment

“For you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
— 1 Corinthians 6:20

Stay committed to your abstinence journey.

When I first met my husband, abstaining from sex was not something he was thinking about. But I had already made a promise to God, and I was determined to honor that promise whether he stuck around or not.

My commitment to God had to be greater than my desire for a relationship. I knew that if I compromised my convictions just to keep someone in my life, I would be placing that person above the obedience I owed to God.

So I stayed committed.

I continued honoring the promise I had made to the Lord, trusting that obedience to Him would always be worth it—even if it meant walking away from a relationship.

What I discovered was something beautiful. A man who truly loves Jesus will respect a woman who is committed to honoring God. I’m grateful that my husband loved Christ enough, and respected me enough, to WAIT for sex.

Staying committed to abstinence may not always feel easy, especially in a world that constantly tells us to follow our desires. But God’s design for sex was never meant to be casual. It was created to be experienced within the safety, commitment, and covenant of marriage.

If you have made the decision to WAIT, stay committed.

Honor God with your body.

Trust that obedience to Him is never wasted.

There is a man or woman out there who will see your commitment to God and recognize that you are worth the WAIT.

Why The Wait is Worth It

Trusting God’s Design for Relationships

One of the most common arguments against waiting is the idea that you should test sexual compatibility before committing to marriage. Some people believe it’s risky to promise lifelong commitment without first knowing whether the physical connection works.

That thinking has led to the popular mindset:

Try Before You Buy.

But marriage is about so much more than sex.

If you marry someone simply because the sexual connection is strong, your marriage will struggle. Sex is a beautiful benefit of marriage, but it is not the most important part of the union.

Marriage is built on shared faith, commitment, character, trust, and sacrifice. Sex strengthens a marriage, but it cannot sustain a marriage on its own.

Why Stop Now?

Some may ask, “I’ve already had sex, so why stop now? God will forgive me.”

This type of thinking misunderstands grace.

When we truly understand grace, we realize that God blesses us because of Jesus—not because of our obedience. But grace was never meant to encourage continued sin.

Just because you have already had sex does not mean you should continue having sex.

The more we continue in sin, the more damage we bring into our own lives. Premarital sex is harmful, but continuing in it only deepens the damage.

So why stop now?

Because it is never too late to WAIT.

But We’re Planning to Get Married

Some couples say, “We’re going to get married anyway.”

But something that might happen in the future is not a reality today.

Even if you are engaged, you are not married yet. The covenant vows made before God and witnesses matter.

You may think you will marry someone, but sometimes relationships we thought would last forever do not.

How many of us believed someone was “the one” only to find out later that they weren’t?

When we choose not to do things God’s way, we miss out on His blessings.

If you want God’s blessing in your life and in your future marriage, honor Him now while you are dating or single.

Pursue Christ First

We cannot live this way in our own strength.

You cannot abstain without the power of Christ.
You cannot find the right spouse without Christ.
You cannot build a godly marriage without Christ.

Our number one pursuit must always be Jesus.

Everything and everyone—including ourselves—must come second to Him.

If your relationship with Christ has been shallow or based more on religion than relationship, commit today to pursuing Him more deeply.

We often sing that we need more of Jesus.

But the truth is, Jesus needs more of us.

He gave us everything when He died on the cross.

Choosing to WAIT isn’t about restriction.

It’s about reverence.

It’s about honoring the One who created you.

Because when we trust God’s design, we experience God’s best.

1 Corinthians 6:20

“You were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”

WAIT.
Honor Christ with your body.

Reflection

• Am I trusting God’s design for relationships and marriage?

• Are my dating choices honoring Christ?

• Is my relationship with Jesus the foundation of my decisions?

Grace after Sexual Sin

“Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
— Matthew 26:41

Jesus understands our weakness.

He knows we are not perfect and that we are all capable of falling into temptation. That is why He gives us this instruction: watch and pray.

Stay alert. Stay connected to God.

Prayer is not something we do only after we fall—it is something we do before temptation ever shows up.

Pray before you’re tempted.

Ask the Lord to guide your eyes and your thoughts as you scroll through the internet so you won’t be drawn into pornography.

Pray when you feel lonely and are tempted to call an ex you know is not leading you closer to Christ.

Pray with thanksgiving when your Heavenly Father gives you the strength to resist temptation.

And when you do fall—because sometimes we do—pray in repentance. Bring your failure honestly before the Lord and receive the grace He offers.

No matter what situation you find yourself in, pray.

God’s grace is not permission to keep sinning. It is an invitation to return to Him.

There are incredible rewards awaiting those who receive God’s grace and allow it to transform their lives. But there are also serious consequences for those who treat His grace as something they are entitled to.

Grace is not something God owes us.

Grace is a gift.

And it is a gift meant to lead us back to Him.

So take a moment right now.

Talk to God.

He is always available.

Reflection

• When I face temptation, do I turn to God in prayer first or after I’ve already given in?

• Are there situations or habits in my life that make me more vulnerable to temptation?

• When I fall short, do I run toward God in repentance or away from Him in shame?

• How can I intentionally rely on God’s grace and strength this week?

The Cost of Compromise

Vance Havner once said:

“When the Lord’s sheep are a dirty gray, all black sheep are more comfortable.”

That statement perfectly captures what compromise does.

When believers begin to drift, when we allow our standards to become blurred, when our obedience becomes optional, the line between right and wrong begins to fade.

Compromise makes sin feel normal.

I read a post recently asking whether the Bible actually says we shouldn’t have sex before marriage. Someone responded with several Scriptures that clearly addressed the topic.

But the reply ended with this statement:

“But if you do it’s ok. Times have definitely changed and God knew they would.”

Yes, times have changed.

But Jesus hasn’t.

And His Word hasn’t either.

Isaiah 40:8 reminds us:

“The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever.”

Hebrews 13:8 tells us:

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”

Culture may change.
Opinions may change.
Standards may shift.

But God’s truth does not.

The purpose of sin has always been the same—to destroy, to keep us in bondage, and to separate us from Christ.

That’s why compromise is so dangerous.

It slowly convinces us that what God calls sin is no longer a big deal. It whispers that disobedience is acceptable because God is loving and forgiving.

And yes, God is forgiving.

His grace is real, and He extends it to us every day.

But grace was never meant to be an excuse for continued rebellion.

Grace is meant to transform us.

God’s grace invites us to repentance. It calls us to leave sin behind and walk in obedience.

So don’t allow culture to convince you that disobeying God is “okay.”

And don’t take the Lord’s grace for granted by continuing with the same attitudes and the same actions.

Let His grace change you.

Let His grace shape you.

Let His grace lead you closer to Him every day.

God’s grace is precious.

Don’t abuse it.

Reflection

• Have I allowed culture to redefine what God calls sin?

• Am I relying on God’s grace as an excuse instead of allowing it to transform me?

• What areas of my life need to move from compromise to obedience?

Boundaries

Because We Can’t Just Do Whatever We Want

I’m a 70’s baby, so 90’s hip hop was my jam when I was in high school. One song that used to get a lot of play was Doowutchyalike by Digital Underground. The message of that song was simple: do whatever you want.

As teenagers, that sounded like freedom. Sing it loud. Live how you want. No restrictions.

But kingdom living says the exact opposite.

Following Christ means recognizing that we can’t just do whatever we want.

The Bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 6:18 to flee from sexual immorality. Not manage it. Not get close to it. Not see how far we can go without crossing a line.

Flee.

Verse 19 of that same chapter reminds us why:

“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit…?”

Our bodies are not our own playgrounds to do whatever we please. They are temples of the Holy Spirit. And temples are meant to be treated with reverence.

When we sin against our bodies, we aren’t just breaking a rule—we are grieving the Holy Spirit.

That’s why boundaries matter.

Boundaries are not about restriction for the sake of control. They are about protection. They help guard our hearts, our minds, and our bodies from choices that pull us away from Christ.

Following Jesus comes with a cost.

In Matthew 16:24, Jesus says:

“If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.”

Denying ourselves is not a popular message in a culture that constantly tells us to follow our feelings and do what makes us happy. But discipleship requires surrender.

It requires renouncing self.

It requires choosing Christ over our desires.

As a teenager, I sang Doowutchyalike loud and proud. But as an adult with a growing relationship with Christ, I’ve learned something important:

It’s no longer my will.

It’s His.

And living according to His will will always lead to something better than simply doing whatever we want.

Reflection

• What boundaries do I need to put in place to protect my walk with Christ?

• Am I following culture’s message of “do what you want,” or Christ’s call to deny myself?

• What area of my life do I need to surrender to God today?

WAIT: Why God’s Design for Sex Still Matters

Growing up, I was never given spiritual reasons not to have sex.

Most of the warnings I heard sounded something like this: Boys are up to no good. Or You don’t want to end up pregnant.

To some degree, both of those statements were true. But the deeper reason that should have been planted in my heart was this:

Jesus didn’t design it that way.

Sex outside of marriage is not simply a bad decision or an unwise choice. According to Scripture, it is sin.

And God cares about what we do with our bodies.

In First Epistle to the Thessalonians 5:23, Paul writes that our whole spirit, soul, and body are to be kept blameless. That sounds like the total package to me. God isn’t only concerned with our spiritual lives while ignoring our physical actions. Our bodies matter to Him.

In fact, the Bible consistently reminds us that what we do with our bodies reflects our relationship with Christ.

Another passage that always comes to mind is Book of Psalms 139, where David reminds us that God is everywhere. There is nowhere we can go that escapes His presence.

That means when we choose sexual sin, it isn’t hidden.

God is there.

He is present in the room.
He is present in the car.
He is present wherever that decision takes place.

That might sound almost comical when you first think about it, but it’s actually a very sobering truth.

Jesus sees what we do with the body He entrusted to us.

Purity isn’t just about avoiding consequences like pregnancy or heartbreak.

It’s about honoring Christ with the body He gave us.

God designed sex to be a beautiful gift within marriage—a reflection of commitment, intimacy, and covenant. When we take that gift outside of the place God designed for it, we misuse something sacred.

But here is the good news.

Even if you didn’t hear these truths growing up, it’s never too late to start living them now.

Jesus offers forgiveness, grace, and a fresh start. The goal is not perfection—it’s obedience.

Choosing to WAIT isn’t about restriction.

It’s about reverence.

It’s about honoring the One who created you.

And honoring Christ with your body is always worth it.

Reflection

• Am I honoring Christ with my body?

• Have I allowed culture to shape my view of sexuality more than Scripture?

• What steps can I take today to live in obedience to God’s design?

WAIT!

Why God Calls Us to WAIT for Sex Until Married

The Lord placed WAIT on my heart as a call to encourage wholehearted submission to Jesus Christ with our bodies.

I’m a firm believer that there are two areas we struggle the most to surrender to God: our money and our bodies. Yet if we truly desire to serve Christ, we must give Him every part of our lives. Jesus does not ask to be Lord over some areas—He asks to be Lord of all.

Waiting in an Impatient World

Let’s be honest—who likes waiting?

We live in a world built on impatience. Everything is instant. Instant food, instant answers, instant gratification. The faster the better.

But there is one thing our Savior, Jesus Christ, calls us to wait for.

Drumroll please…

Sex.

Yes, S-E-X.

Abstinence is not a popular subject. In fact, it’s often avoided altogether. But the truth is, it is necessary for those who desire to live according to God’s will.

In a culture that encourages people to do what they want, when they want, with whomever they want, the idea of denying our desires seems almost unthinkable.

But I’ve never been one to simply follow the crowd.

So I’m taking this opportunity to encourage us all to do something countercultural.

WAIT.

My Honest Testimony

You might be wondering, Did you wait?

My honest answer is no.

And if I’m being completely transparent, I wish I had.

That regret is part of the reason this message is so important to me. I want to encourage young men and women to avoid the pitfalls and mistakes I made. I want to encourage believers to truly follow Christ by living obedient lives in every aspect of their lives.

Why Should We Wait?

Because God calls us to

📖 1 Corinthians 7:2

“But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.”

In this verse, the apostle Paul makes it clear that sexual intimacy is designed to exist within marriage.

📖 Hebrews 13:4

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”

The marriage bed is sacred. Sex was created by God, but it was created specifically for the covenant relationship between husband and wife.

Any sexual activity before marriage, outside of marriage, or in addition to a married relationship is considered sexual immorality according to Scripture.

📖 1 Thessalonians 4:3–5

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God…”

God calls His people to live differently from the world. That includes exercising self-control and honoring Him with our bodies.

📖 1 Corinthians 7:8–9

“To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”

God provides a clear and honorable place for sexual intimacy—marriage.

The Lies Culture Tells Us

Our culture sends constant messages about sex.

It tells us:

• “Everyone is doing it.”

• “You need to test sexual compatibility.”

• “If you love someone, sex is expected.”

• “You can’t control those desires.”

But none of those statements are rooted in God’s truth.

The world teaches us to follow our feelings.
God teaches us to follow His Word.

Feelings change.
Culture changes.
But God’s standards never change.

The Blessing of Waiting

Waiting is not punishment—it is protection.

When we wait, we protect:

• Our hearts

• Our spiritual walk

• Our future marriage

• Our relationship with Christ

God does not give us commands to take something good away from us. He gives us commands because He knows what will ultimately bless us and protect us.

Waiting may not always be easy, but obedience to Christ always leads to life, peace, and freedom.

A Final Encouragement

If you have already made mistakes in this area, you are not disqualified.

God is a God of grace, forgiveness, and restoration.

Your past does not have to define your future.

Today can be the day you make a new commitment to honor Christ with your body.

You can start fresh.
You can walk in obedience.
You can choose a different path.

And that path begins with a simple but powerful decision:

WAIT.